As far as therapeutic separation is concerned, this is a physical limitation and does not require the consent of another person. If someone wants a therapeutic separation, they can ask their partner to leave the house, and they can also choose to go if they prefer. Or, if your partner decides not to go when asked, he can go to meet their therapeutic separation needs. After integration, agreements include what a partner wants to see from the addict after separation. If that sounds like a useful idea, there are a few things you want to agree on in advance. One of them is the length of the separation. Normally, one couple needs or wants more time than the other. The time required is usually longer than expected by the spouse, and this must be respected. The partner may be waiting no more than a month to separate and ask why the hack should last so long, while the disenchanted spouse wants and probably needs several months to a year. One thing you don`t want to do is force proximity. It`ll take you even further. I`ve seen that couples take up to two years to change things the way they want. Be patient.
Also discuss how you want to inform your family, friends and children of your separation. These are also complex issues for which you should seek professional advice and support. Either of you are probably opposed to a stage of growth that you need to do, if you are married or if you decide to divorce. If you don`t do this now, he`ll follow you where you`re going. If you enter into a new relationship, this stage of growth will be there and will be waiting for you, just like your raging dog who takes you home and waits for you at your doorstep. “Oh, goody. You`re at home. Let me in. Structured separation allows them to have the time and space to do the necessary growth steps without disassembling the whole relationship, and often the family to do so.
One of the biggest mistakes couples make when they end a period of separation is not an agreement on what will happen in the future. It is not uncommon for an addict to return to the family home and, in the space of three months, has significantly reduced his commitment to healing – or worse – completely abandoned it. A separation agreement will contain many of the same details as a divorce agreement, such as custody of children and spos assistance. According to Granvold, D. K. (1983). Structured separation for marital treatment and decision-making. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 9, 403-412. Thank you for your insights. This is what I was looking for when a classmate suggested that I consider a structured separation for our situation. Many of the factors and benefits agree in our relationship. Thank you again.
Identifying reintegration goals – and retaining them – is crucial to the success of therapeutic separation.